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  • Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman
    • Books 1 - 10
      • 1. Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman
      • 2. Further Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman
      • 3. The Hitwoman Gets Lucky
      • 4. The Hitwoman and the Family Jewels
      • 5. The Hitwoman and the Neurotic Witness
      • 6. The Hitwoman Hunts a Ghost
      • 7. The Hitwoman and the 7 Cops
      • 8. The Hitwoman and the Poisoned Apple
      • 9. The Hitwoman’s Downward Dog
      • 10. The Hitwoman’s Act of Contrition
    • Books 11 - 20
      • 11. The Hitwoman Hires a Manny
      • 12. The Hitwoman and the Sacrificial Lamb
      • 13. The Hitwoman and the Chubby Cherub
      • 14. The Hitwoman and the Mother Load
      • 15. The Hitwoman Under Pressure
      • 16. The Hitwoman Plays Chaperone
      • 17. The Hitwoman Takes a Road Trip
      • 18. The Hitwoman in a Pickle
      • 19. The Hitwoman and the Gold Digger
      • 20. The Hitwoman's Juggling Act
    • Books 21 - 30
      • 21. The Hitwoman and the Fallen Angel
      • 22. The Hitwoman Goes to Prison
      • 23. The Hitwoman and the Exorcism
      • 24. The Hitwoman Plays Games
      • 25. The Hitwoman Owes A Favor
      • 26. The Hitwoman and the Teddy Bear
      • 27. The Hitwoman and the Body
      • 28. The Hitwoman Pays A Debt
      • 29. The Hitwoman Plays Courier
      • 30. The Hitwoman’s Girls’ Night Out
    • Books 31 - 37
      • 31. The Hitwoman’s Getaway
      • 32. The Hitwoman vs The Security Guard
      • 33. The Hitwoman Investigates
      • 34. The Hitwoman Gets Her Man
      • 35. The Hitwoman and the Ninjas
      • 36. The Hitwoman’s Charity Case
      • 37. The Hitwoman’s Egg Hunt
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Further Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman

Further Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman

Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman Book 2

“If you liked the Stephanie Plum series by Janet Evanovich, this is for you.“
~Amazon Review

Take three wacky aunts, two talking animals, one nervous bride, and an upcoming hit, and you’ve got the follow-up to JB Lynn’s wickedly funny Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman.

Knocking off a drug kingpin was the last thing on Maggie Lee’s to-do list, but when a tragic accident leaves her beloved niece orphaned and in the hospital, Maggie will go to desperate lengths to land the money needed for her care.

But the drug kingpin is the least of her worries. Maggie’s aunts are driving her crazy, her best friend’s turned into a bridezilla…and a knock on the head has given Maggie Dr. Dolittle abilities—she can talk to animals. Unfortunately, they talk back. ​

It’s just another day in the life of this neurotic hitwoman…

Excerpt

 

Prologue

You just know it’s going to be a bad day when you’re stuck at a red light and Doomsday is breathing down your neck.

In this particular instance Doomsday happens to be a seventy-pound Doberman pinscher. Instead of having the voice of doom, she sounds an awful lot like an air-headed, bimbo-y blonde. “Way that! Way that!”

Did I mention that Doomsday has really lousy grammar?

“Not that way,” Severus Snape drawled from the front passenger seat. Okay, not really Snape, but God … zilla, a talking brown anole lizard with an attitude to match his namesake.

Have you followed all this so far? The superior talking lizard is in the front passenger seat, the breathy Doberman is in the back, and I, Maggie Lee, am in the driver’s seat, even though it doesn’t feel as though I’m in control of this wild ride we’re on.

I know this whole thing sounds crazy. I know animals can’t talk, but ever since I was in a terrible car accident a month ago, I can understand them. Of course I haven’t mentioned this little side effect to anyone, because I’m afraid they’ll lock up my crazy ass in the nuthouse (hell, with my luck, they’d probably make me room with my mom, who’s a long-term resident), and I’ve just got too much to do to let that happen.

Which brings me to why God and Doomsday were arguing about which direction we were headed. I needed to kill someone at a wedding.

It’s a toss-up which I hate more: killing people or weddings.

Unfortunately, I’m getting pretty good at both.

 “I see a disco ball in your future.” Armani Vasquez, the closest thing I had to a friend at Insuring the Future, delivered this pronouncement right after she sprinkled a handful of candy corn into her Caesar salad.

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