4 Wonky Jinxes

Prologue

You know you’re an unhappy camper when your RV has been jinxed.

At least, that was what the working theory was of what we were dealing with. Princess, the bright pink RV that had been owned by my former mother-in-law, Mildred Bloodworth, had four flat tires. We had tried a couple different spells to re-inflate them, but nothing had worked so far. 

“That Becky is a powerful witch, too,” Mildred said when the third attempt failed. “It’s too bad she didn’t stick around. She could have helped break the chain.” 

I glanced down at the Siamese cat who stood beside me. We both wanted the connection that cursed us to be bound together for eternity to be broken. That’s why I’d started driving her ugly pink RV around in the first place, trying to right the wrongs Mildred had done when she’d been in witch-form. We’d now collected all the charms for the bracelet, brought her son, Redenbacher, back from the dead, and restored her heart. But she was still a cat and we were still stuck together.

“I need to think,” she meowed and trotted off.

Marco, a former wizard’s assistant, was in his silver Airstream researching how to break the jinx. I decided to sit with Karen and have a cup of coffee. Maybe more caffeine would solve the problem of the tires. It certainly couldn’t hurt.

“No luck?” she asked as I poured myself a mug and sank into the chair beside her.

“Not yet.” Worry squeezed my gut as I watched Sol, in dragon form. He seemed to be an even lighter shade of violet than I remembered. That couldn’t be good.

“Dragons are hot.” Karen watched as the purple dragon played with her little boy, Richie. “What’s he like in bed?”

I sputtered on my coffee. “We haven’t, um…”

Karen stared at me incredulously. “Are you kidding?”

I shook my head. Embarrassed, I kept my attention on the boy and the dragon. What she couldn’t see, but I could, was that Richie was glowing green. Not just his eyes, but his entire body. It made me nervous. If I could see it, other magical beings in the area might be able to, also.

“But you and Sol seem so perfect together,” Karen said with a rapturous sigh, clasping her hands over her heart, practically swooning.

I glanced back at her. She’d been through a rough time lately, thinking that the love of her life, Jeval, had returned. Unfortunately, it hadn’t been the Life Essence, the father of her son. It had been a Death posing as him. We’d barely been able to defeat the Death, even with the help of some Elemental Eternals. 

With Richie glowing as brightly green as he was, I had no doubt that someone else would soon come for the boy. The knowledge made me nervous.

I glanced around our little camp. I knew Sol had put a protection spell in place, but I wasn’t sure it would be enough. I wanted to get out of the campground Incantato, but Becky had made sure that Princess wasn’t up to that with her jinx.

I frowned, annoyed once again that she’d stolen the white camper that had been owned by the Wind Eternal, Ben, and run off in the middle of the night. You turn someone from a talking goldfish back into a witch, and that’s how she repays you.

I looked off in the distance and saw that Redenbacher, Red for short, was swinging in a hammock with his mother, Mildred, curled on his chest.

Not wanting to discuss my sex life, or lack thereof, I told Karen, “I’m going to see if Marco has come up with anything yet.” 

She nodded, then chuckled as the dragon threw her little boy into the air and caught him before he hit the ground. Richie was squealing with delight, and it appeared that Sol was having fun, too. I didn’t understand how they could be so lighthearted considering danger was no doubt right around the corner. 

Walking over to Marco’s camper, I called out for him, then waited for him to answer before getting too close to the vehicle. The last time I’d tried to enter without his permission, I’d been shrunk down to mere inches. I did not want that to happen again. Almost getting pulverized because I couldn’t be seen had been pretty scary. 

“Come in, Ravena,” Marco called. 

I approached cautiously.

“He gave you permission,” Conroy, the owl pendant hanging around my neck, said. 

“Forgive me for being a little cautious,” I snapped at my magical aide. I was still annoyed that the redia hadn’t warned me the first time that Marco’s Airstream was actually a hod, a magical vessel. If he had, I’d have given it a wide berth.

“It’s safe,” Marco called, as though he knew exactly what I was thinking. 

I held my breath as I opened the door but received no electric shock, and as far as I could tell, I remained normal-sized. I climbed inside slowly. It smelled like a mix of beeswax candles and aromatic spices. Unlike other campers I’d been in, none of the furniture seemed to be affixed. Marco was sitting in a rocking chair, studying a large leather-bound book. 

He glanced up at me. “Coffee?” 

I shook my head.

He pointed to a giant oversized ottoman. “Have a seat.”

I sank down and tried to look casual, but really, I was fascinated. I’d never been inside a camper hod before. This particular magical container was bigger on the inside, or so I’d been told. But at first glance, it looked like any other RV.

Marco looked up over his book at me for a long second and then closed it. “What’s bothering you, Ravena?” 

I shook my head. “Besides not being able to drive my RV?”

“We’ll figure that out,” he assured me.

“I just can’t understand why Mildred or Sol don’t know how to do it,” I admitted.

“Jinxes are child’s play, to some degree,” Marco explained. He seemed to know the answers to almost all of my questions, which was surprising, considering he wasn’t the least bit magical himself. “There are four kinds of jinxes. You can jinx things, people, thoughts, or lives.” He sounded very serious as he said the last. 

“So if you jinx a thing, it doesn’t work?” I asked.

He nodded. “If you jinx someone’s thoughts, they always make the wrong guess. They can get in the wrong line at the supermarket or always forget someone’s name.” 

That made sense in a strange way. “And if you jinx people?”

He fiddled with the edge of his mustache thoughtfully. “Have you ever known someone who seemed to live under a black cloud? Where everything in their life that could go wrong, seemed to?”

I raised my hand.

He chuckled. “You’re not jinxed, you’re cursed. And quelled.”

“Oh gee,” I said sarcastically. “Too bad there’s not a third thing so that I could be the perfect trifecta.” 

He thoughtfully, stroked his mustache. 

I frowned. I’d kind of wanted him to reassure me.

“As for a life,” he said somberly, “if someone jinxes a life, the repercussions can last…”

“A lifetime?” I guessed.

Looking away, Marco shrugged. “That is what they say.”

“And have you found a way to break the jinx on Princess?”

He shook his head. “Not yet.”

“I don’t understand. You said it’s child’s play. Why is finding a solution so difficult?”

He looked around his RV, refusing to look me in the eye. I got the distinct impression he was hiding something. That was unusual for him. He’s usually so forthcoming.

“Marco?” I asked gently. “Is there something you’re not telling us?”

He sighed heavily. “It’s the eggbeater.”

I blinked, wondering what an eggbeater had to do with anything. “Excuse me?”

“The eggbeater,” he explained. “The one I found at the thrift shop?”

I wondered why he made the statement a question.

“I remember,” I told him. It was also the place that Richie had found his second Element box. I didn’t mention that. 

“I kind of knew it was enchanted when I got it,” he admitted guiltily.

“How?” I asked.

“There was a rune carved into it,” he admitted. 

“Okay, so Becky is walking around with an enchanted kitchen implement,” I said slowly. “What does that mean?”

He shrugged. 

“You must have an idea, or you wouldn’t be keeping it a secret,” I told him testily.

“I think the unquelled witch is in possession of another witch’s wand,” he confessed.

“And what does that mean?” I pushed. 

He shrugged and opened his book again. Pretending to be studying it, he muttered, “It means her magic could be wonky.”

“Wonky?” I asked with a grin. “Is that the official magical term? Wonky?” 

“No,” Conroy, the owl pendant, piped up. “Wonky isn’t right, poisoned is.”

The grin fell off my face, and I gaped at Marco.

He looked away guiltily. 

“You poisoned Becky’s magic?” I fumed.

Marco winced. “I didn’t know she’d get her hands on it. I didn’t think anybody would get it. I just wanted it for my collection.”

“Collection? You go around collecting witches’ wands?”

“Wizards’ too,” he said with a defensive shrug. “I don’t believe in magical sexism.”

I almost asked what that even meant, but decided it was smarter to keep the conversation on task.“Why?”

“Because it’s the only chance I’m ever going to have of finding my wizard.” 

He slammed his book shut, jumped out of his rocking chair, and stormed out of the Airstream. 

I sat there, slightly dazed. Marco didn’t normally lose his temper. I had trodden on a sensitive area, obviously.

“He’s on a quest,” Conroy mused. 

“Aren’t we all,” I muttered. 

Before I could ask him anything else about finding a missing wizard, I saw a blue shimmer outside the RV’s window.

I gulped nervously. A blue shimmer means magic is coming. And that usually meant trouble.